The true definition of a wake and bake is debatable. Some smokers would claim that a true wake and bake is when you beginning smoke immediately after waking up. For the purpose of this post I’m going to go broad and consider a wake and bake to be any time you smoke shortly after waking up.
Don’t take these commandments to heart. Rules are made to be broken, especially on your off days.
1. Thou shalt have no shower before me.
Try to smoke before you take a shower. This will ensure that you are flying high without wreaking of smoke.
[Tweet “I like getting nice a toasty before taking my shower. #WakeandBake”]
2. Thou shalt make unto thee an awesome breakfast.
Compliment your smoke session with a nice hearty breakfast. Start your day with a smoke session and a full stomach, and you’re on your way to the best day ever.
[Tweet “Wake and bake is the most important smoke of the day. #WakeandBake”]
3. Thou shalt not brush teeth in vain.
Wait until after you smoke to brush your teeth to keep your breath nice and fresh.
[Tweet “Get stoned then get ready. Flying high and smelling fresh. #WakeandBake”]
4. Remember the time and keep on rolling.
Do you have somewhere to be that day? Make sure you keep an eye on the clock, so you don’t lose track of time.
[Tweet “I have to set my clock back 10 minutes to #WakeandBake.”]
5. Honor thy shirt and thy pants.
Don’t wear your day’s outfit during a wake and bake session. Just smoke in your pajamas. You don’t want to go to work with your shirt smelling like smoke or ash on your pants.
[Tweet “I’m only going to smoke in my pajamas from now on. #WakeandBake”]
6. Thou shalt not fall back asleep.
First thing in the morning it’s probably best to smoke a sativa strain if you have an option. You don’t want your high to make you fall back asleep and be late for something important. This only counts if you have something to do that day. On days off, laying around, smoking, and napping can be great therapy for a challenging week.
[Tweet “Hitting a bowl and hitting the snooze button basically accomplish the same thing. #WakeandBake”]
7. Thou shalt not hastefully smoke.
Wake up early enough to give yourself plenty of time to have a nice relaxing morning session. Trying to smoke as you run out the door can be a bit of a buzz kill.
[Tweet “It takes me so long to get ready. Most of the time is spent smoking. #WakeandBake”]
8. Thou shalt not forget liquids.
No smoke session is complete without something to drink. You don’t want your throat to be scratchy first thing in the morning. I suggest a tall glass of orange juice.
[Tweet “Grab me two bottles of water. One of them is for the bong. #WakeandBake”]
9. Thou shalt not bear red eyes.
Is the public going to see you today? Do your eyes look bloodshot? Make sure you keep a bottle of eyedrops in stock. Seriously, they’re like 2 bucks.
[Tweet “Do you think they’ll believe me if I say my eyes are red from allergies? #WakeandBake”]
10. Thou shalt not smell up thy neighbors house or hallway.
Remember that when you’re up before work so are many other people, including kids leaving for school. Be considerate of your neighbors. If you live in an apartment put a wet towel at the bottom of the door.
[Tweet “A blunt for me, and a wet towel at the door for my neighbors. #WakeandBake”]
If you enjoyed this article then here’s a few of my other articles you might like:
About to wake and bake 3-17-15
Breakfast of Champions!!!
That’s my Bday! A little late but still!
I have found that showers sort of diminish my high until after i get out of the shower.
Funny you say that. I had a friend say the same thing not too long ago. I guess it just affects people differently. I love it, but be careful. People get injured all the time from slipping in the shower.
Cheers 12-25-15, Merry Christmas you filthy animals, berry white an the crew stopped by for a sesh
Cheers! Wake and Bake on Christmas Morning is a must. I hope you enjoyed your holidays 🙂
No class today, it’s my day off! Never thought about the neighbor one, good tip! About to take a snap and get squeaky clean.
Enjoy your day off. Thanks for checking out the blog 🙂
13/03/16 – UK Scene represent. WakeAndBake
Dig the blog. Wakin and baking with the lads at home. Tasmania Australia!
Thanks for stopping by. Cheers!
For once someone considers others when they smoke weed and tell you to put a wet towel at the door so we aren’t inhaling that stinky crap! I wish smoking it was illegal. Eat the crap if you want but don’t put in my lungs with your second hand smoke, you’re so thoughtless to do that. Kids, pets, we all suffer it. That’s NOT your right to do to us. I don’t fart in your face – oh and then make that fart a chemical that can screw up your brain in sufficient amount to even get this half way clear to you folks. Glad that America thinks lowering the entire country’s IQ is now at large – making dumbing down legal. Alcohol does NOT make a person dumb as pot does, not in a million years!
That’s the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard. Alcohol deaths vs marijuana deaths. Look up the stats. Alcohol is far more dangerous than marijuana.
I’m not quite sure what you’re referring to since this wasn’t discussed in the article. Was the meant as a reply to another comment?
Cheers from Norway! just hit a bowl IN the shower, now I will make a magical breakfast
Wake and Bake is the breakfast of champions. Me personally, I do it as soon as I wake up. Alot of art is involved in my day so i like to have my mind right when painting, it also helps me focus on tedious tasks especially early in the morning. Also #6 “Thou shall not fall back to sleep” Hey! That was learned lol, I remember when I was a noob smoking,Wake and Bakes used to put me into the ground. Now, He-Man lungs. Good Article.
Oh me! I can see why me means just one. Geez! In your case the dumbing down of America would be you were born that way.
Anyone ever “scrape the pipe” for resin? Ever been so desperate you smoke stems and seeds?
Word up! BONG HITS!
Is never late Bong is great and commandments.